Dear Reader…
Since
the title of I Am the Product of Rape ―A Memoir has intrigued you, it is
quite possible you already understand the subject matter involves incest, rape
and sexual abuse. Let me first say thank you for your interest in reading my
story and that of my daughter. We share our journey with the deep and sincere
hope that it will open doors of healing and growth for anyone who has
experienced sexual abuse, been connected to an abusive family system, felt the
wrath of rejection, or walked the often jagged pathways of foster care and
adoption. We recognize the extraordinary courage it takes to read about such
subjects when you or someone you love has been adversely affected.
Our
story begins with a ferocious human predator ripping through our family,
drooling over the innocent―leaving none untouched. Generations of child
predators have devoured their vulnerable offspring and siblings, molesting our
family’s youth unconcerned about the magnitude of their actions. Silence has
become the gateway to mental health issues throughout our lineage. I Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir
exposes generational secrets, lies, cover-ups and denial and their
consequences. Told from my perspective, this is my family story, a glimpse into
four women irreversibly scarred by traumatic abuse.
The
family matriarch, my grandmother, a prolific mother of ten, sets the tone for
all of us women who would place our feet in the footprints of her journey. Her
decisions transform her ancestry for generations to come. Refusing her child
love, protection, safety and happiness for material wealth is significant to
her legacy. Her story sheds light on the transgressions she not only allowed
but participated in.
Next,
there is the vulnerable, shy girl who endured the death of her childhood at the
hands of her stepfather. Incest, abuse, betrayal, humiliation, and rape
inhumanly tore through her seven year old body. Well before puberty she was
sexually exploited in her own home, her childhood, mind and body all repeatedly
violated. While her mother, my grandmother, lived in denial of the events
taking place in their home, this innocent child was consistently, savagely
tormented by her stepfather who exercised power and control over her. To
survive she separated her two worlds, disconnecting from the brutality she incessantly
endured. Inevitable, at twelve years old that vulnerable, shy girl gave birth a
child. She gave birth to me!
Then,
there is me, born on a filthy basement floor to a twelve year old. I Am the
Product of Rape. I am an adoptee, I am a daughter, and I am a mother of
three. In search of my future, I found the weighted baggage of the past.
Catholic Social Services documents helped to chronicle my life, as did the many
conversations I have had over the years with sometimes very reluctant people―relatives,
social workers, and paper pushers, all of whom seemed to guard my past as it
floundered aimlessly, leaving lingering, unanswered questions. Through the
process of connecting with my past much was revealed. I came to learn that from
my first breath I was discarded, unwanted, unloved and homeless. My journey
through foster homes the adoption system, and the intense emotional peaks and
valleys concluded with me being adopted becoming the fourth member of a middle
class Catholic family. The mother of the
family had love enough for one of her children and I was not that child.
Finally,
along this sexual-abuse sojourn, I unfortunately discovered my daughter's
devastating experience. Crushing my very core, this revelation sent my life
careening in another unexpected direction, straight through my children's lives
into a fourth-generation nightmare. The ripple effects of demoralizing incest,
the sexual slavery of serial rape, and the brutality of molestation go beyond
their impact on the direct victims, transmitting a trauma that oozes
intergenerationally. This story intertwines the DNA of my family's bloodline.
My daughter and I recognized the importance of I Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir as an asset in healing when women
and girls learning of its content began coming forward and sharing their
experiences, commending us for the courage to discuss these taboo subjects and
confirming the great need for this memoir. As women relieved themselves
of secrets long hidden behind mother-daughter relationships that were not so
warm and fuzzy ―involving life-altering experiences with secret adoption
or forced abortions and life-transforming journeys through a foster care system
that was not always kind―we recognized that our family was not alone in
its experiences. In coffee shop discussions, at restaurants, through emails,
and during airplane conversations,
we found incest, rape, and molestation to be shrouded in secrecy and
buried in the psyches of many women.
Women
were often interested in discussions, though almost always those discussions
would be on behalf of "a friend." Instinctively, in many cases, we
knew some of these vulnerable victims were uncomfortable or unwilling to reveal
their stories firsthand, owing to the shame, stigma, heaviness or guilt that
make them reluctant to bring such ugliness to light. Often overlooked, excused,
and even denied, abuse takes on infinite forms ―this is especially true
of psychological abuse.
At our core is assisting others in need of healing
from trauma. Making trauma a priority, we listen, believe, and care then
encourage, empower and initiate behavior change which is our principal. As
authors of I Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir, we have developed an
interactive Workbook we have titled #HealingSecretHurts
or (#HSH). In conjunction with I Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir,
#HSH, and utilizing other tools we conduct small to mid-size acquisition
sessions which, with attendees, explores the raw subject matters exposed in I
Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir. Sessions are implemented in safe,
confidential, comfortable environments. Our mother daughter synergy educates,
enlightens and empowers as we share our experiences while bringing the spectrum
of traumatizing sexual assault to light. We can personally testify that there is a purpose in all
that we have been through. The events described in I Am the Product of Rape―A Memoir led us to the great privilege of
reaching out to others with our story in which, somehow, horror becomes
hope. My daughter and I know our experience will move you, assist you in
discovering your own truth and allow you the tools towards your own healing
journey. We would like to conclude by reminding you that you are not alone.
Thank you for your interest in I Am the Product of Rape ―A Memoir and
#HSH.
Love,
Catherine Wyatt-Morley
Author of I
Am the Product of Rape ―A Memoir
Jalyon Welsh-Cole
Author of I
Am the Product of Rape ―A Memoir, Epilogue Burning House
About the Authors
Catherine Wyatt-Morley is the founder, chief executive
officer and heartbeat of Women On Maintaining Education and
Nutrition, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit social service organization for the
at-risk and HIV-positive community. In 1994, Wyatt-Morley founded Women On
Reasons To Heal (W.O.R.T.H.), the first and what has become the oldest
HIV-positive women’s support group in Middle Tennessee.
Wyatt-Morley
has appeared in countless media outlets nationwide, including SELF Magazine,
the Today Show, A&U Magazine, POZ Magazine, CNN, Voices of America, MSNBC,
Talk America Radio, FX Radio, SiriusXM Satellite Radio, the Palm Beach Post,
the Indianapolis Indiana Recorder, the Los Angeles Times, the Canadian Sun,
Nashville Scene, and the Tennessean.
Jalyon Welsh-Cole has been director
of Women On Maintaining Education and
Nutrition, a 501(c) (3) nonprofit social service organization, since 2010.
Welsh-Cole began writing when she was very young, starting with short stories
and poems. As a teen, she was inspired to draw, finding comfort and creativity
in her art. She joined forces with Wyatt-Morley to share her story in I AM THE PRODUCT OF RAPE – A MEMOIR. Together,
they also have created #HealingSecretHurts workshops,
which bring the spectrum of traumatizing sexual assault into the light.
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About the Book:
The phrase “secrets and lies” takes on
terrible new meaning in Catherine Wyatt-Morley’s devastating book, I AM THE PRODUCT OF RAPE – A MEMOIR.
Wyatt-Morley’s shocking story traces the repeated patterns of rape
and incest that plagued four generations of her family, including
Wyatt-Morley’s birth in a filthy basement to her 12-year-old mother, who was
sexually abused by her step-father.
“…In the process of writing
this book, an extremely difficult journey that has taken years, I was taken to
unfamiliar destinations and exposed to unfathomable pain,” Wyatt-Morley relates.
“Part of that pain was learning that I was created through the atrocities of
incest by a brutally manipulative monster and, while only moments old, (I was) denied
by a heartless grandmother who never bothered to look at me.”
Wyatt-Morley wrote I AM THE
PRODUCT OF RAPE – A MEMOIR, she says, “as my way of dealing with my
personal healing. But through conversations with many diverse women, I quickly
began seeing I was not alone. So many had never told anyone of the abuse that
has happened to them; yet they have a need to heal, to not feel isolated.”
Wyatt-Morley’s daughter, Jalyon
Welsh-Cole, also suffered the terrible legacy of her family when she was abused
by her eldest brother. She wrote the epilogue to I AM THE PRODUCT OF RAPE – A MEMOIR, an essay she called
BURNING HOUSE, in response to the
continued pattern of abuse that formed her familial legacy.
“Most of my family members
who have learned of this are dealing with it as well as one can,” Welsh-Cole
says. “However, others are still in disbelief and struggle to understand. For
over two decades I kept this heinous secret to myself. I have had time to bury
it, cry over it, and finally seek therapy and come to grips with it.”
Welsh-Cole’s mother’s story
“made me feel as if our bloodline was full of secrets and lies that I wanted to
expose,” she continues. “I knew after learning of my grandmother’s story that I
wasn’t alone. Today, I cannot allow this to continue to happen in our family.”
As dark and unrelenting as it is, the story told in I AM THE PRODUCT OF RAPE – A MEMOIR leads
to a conclusion of overcoming
tremendous odds, leaving readers riveted, inspired, and empowered.
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